Jimmy, head of the Finch Golf Club, was happily enjoying the Halloween party at his clubhouse when Nicktor, who adopted and ran the Haunted House on Hole 11, arrived. Dressed like a vampire, Nicktor did not look ready to be trifled with. Jimmy knew his fun Halloween evening was ruined.
“They’re ruining my haunted house tonight,” Nicktor said, “It’s happening on the most important day of the year—Halloween.”
Jimmy wanted to ask who, but he knew. The course curved so that Hole 11, where the Haunted House sat, and Hole 14 were next to each other. Hole 14 housed the Alternative History Museum.
It seemed like a fun idea. They wanted to explore holidays and events that traditional museums did not cover. They had money and a dedicated staff. In actuality, they reenacted events that had never happened. Jimmy thought for a moment. It can’t be a reenactment if the event never happened in the first place.
“What’s the event tonight?” Jimmy asked.
“Day of the Dead Battle,” Nicktor snarled. “Humans gun down the revolt of the zombies.”
Jimmy just motioned for Nicktor to follow him. Over the course of the year, the group had celebrated “Moon Battle Day”, where they jumped on trampolines as the moon rose to signify the great fight between the moon people and earthlings, which was won by Earth. They had set off fireworks to honor the “Battle of the Kentucky Derby” during a big event for the Decorating Committee. They also toppled the radio tower on Hole 13 to mark “War of the Worlds Day”, claiming that Orson Welles started a galactic civil war when he broadcast a radio play.
In Jimmy’s golf cart, Nicktor relayed that the problem was the fake gunshots. The Haunted House guests would be moving up the golf course towards the house when they heard noises that made them think someone was shooting at them. This caused the patrons to collapse to the ground and not continue to the Haunted House.
Jimmy shook his head, “I tried to get a calendar for them, but it sort of seems…”
“Like the holidays are made up?” Nicktor finished.
Jimmy drove into the battle. Zombies were in hand-to-hand combat with people dressed as Revolutionary War soldiers, who were trying to impale them with bayonets. Every four seconds, there would be a gunshot or cannon shot. The shots were blanks, but it did seem like the zombies would die.
“Hey, there were no golf carts in this battle,” Monroe yelled. The leader of the Alternative History Museum blew a whistle, and everyone stopped.
“This isn’t on your calendar!” Jimmy said, approaching Monroe. “This night is clearly Halloween, and Nicktor is running his Haunted House.”
“We can’t help when the battle was fought,” Monroe said.
“You’re not listening,” Jimmy said, coming up with an idea. “This is Halloween. Didn’t I hear this was the “Day of the Dead Battle?”
“That’s correct,” Monroe said.
“That’s tomorrow,” Jimmy said. He actually knew a little bit about Day of the Dead, and in some places, it was celebrated on Halloween. Jimmy suspected that Monroe hadn’t read enough real history books to know this fact.
Monroe thought for a minute and then blew his whistle. “We have the wrong day, boys. We’ll come back tomorrow.”
No one argued, and everyone seemed happy to walk back towards the building that housed the Alternative History Museum.
“The nice thing about alternative history,” Nicktor said, with a smile, “is that it changes rather quickly.”
The Finch Golf Club is part of a series, you can read other entries here.