I didn’t understand stage fright until I had it. For the first ten years of my life, I rarely hid from the spotlight. I liked being the person out front—the actor, the singer and the entertainer.
In fourth grade, my choir teacher gave me a solo on “Luck Be a Lady” from Guys and Dolls purely because I was singing without a care in the world, and the other guys could barely get a note out. Why were they afraid of a classic Broadway musical?
Then over the course of six months, several missteps completely shook my confidence. Suddenly the spotlight felt like it was coming from a police helicopter.
Stage fright is survivable in sixth grade unless you go to a performing arts school for singing. Then what do you?
It took six years to get over my stage fright, but the journey began with a single piece of advice.
As a Vocal Music major, we had solo days every Friday during Middle School. The first one went poorly for me because my voice cracked in the middle of the song. This was the moment stage fright firmly set in. I survived the next few solo days but was petrified. I performed, but I had no stage presence. I would compare the performances to a singing coat rack.
Usually, we had our solo days in the classroom, but my teacher announced that we were moving to our 300-seat concert hall for mine.
My low-simmering nerves grew as I kept thinking about that performance. I’m going to sing “My Girl” by the Temptations in that hall? There was no sunshine on that cloudy day.
One of my friends could tell I was nervous.
“Why don’t you just go first?” she suggested. I was taken aback and confused. It seemed counterintuitive. However, she quickly laid out the reasons for going first:
- Everyone else performing is worried about how they’ll do. They’re not paying attention to you.
- There isn’t time for your nerves to build up.
- People will remember that you were brave enough to go first.
- After hearing six other singers, it’s unlikely they’ll remember much about you.
So I went first, and it went well. Not only was I surprised, but my classmates were surprised too. They saw hints of confidence! The singing coat rack moved!
Going first became my strategy for everything. I would read aloud first in class, present first and always be ready to volunteer. Gradually over time, I overcame the fear and spent much of my last two years in high school enjoying the spotlight again.
In whatever you’re doing, volunteering to go first is an advantage. People think you’re a confident leader!
It may take years to overcome your fear, but it starts with practicing. Someday, you may even have the nerve to lead in that area.
During my junior year of high school, a friend was very nervous about his own performance. More secure in myself, I gave him the same advice. “Why don’t you go first, ahead of me?”