I Want to Be Effortless (Sitcom Advice)

Eliza!

I love your online persona. It’s so effortless. I follow you on all of the social media accounts. I feel like you constantly hand out good advice on life, fashion and making it in the world. What is your secret?

—Eliza Knows Best

Eliza: I’m so flattered that you think I’m holding this whole thing together. I do have a secret. I don’t know the real me.

Oftentimes, I can be thoughtful and reserved.

However, my online persona is in your face, ready to take names and here for anything you can throw at me.

I don’t like my online persona very much, but I spend so much time studying what the algorithm wants. The algorithm wants me to be loud, opinionated and uncompromising. So here we are.

I have a friend I meet for coffee to talk about important issues like public transportation. We have thoughtful discussions about the economics, policy and infrastructure problems that face a city like ours, and how they contribute to difficulties in actually making public transportation better.

Then I go online and say that we are doomed as a species because our best option for public transportation is to build a network of gondolas in every city, but everyone’s ego is too fragile to admit it.

Is the solution to climate change a bunch of gondolas? No

Would it be embarrassing if someone tried to build a network of gondolas? Yes

Would I be thrilled if someone did? Yes

In conclusion, what does the real me think?

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