After hearing a terrible noise from the street, Michael ran outside to identify the commotion. What he found was Ned, marching up the street, and playing a trumpet that was emitting sounds reminiscent of a dying seal.
“Hey, Ned,” Michael yelled to his neighbor.
“Oh, hi, Michael,” Ned yelled back. He let out another horrible-sounding note.
“What are you doing?”
“I joined a band,” Ned said, “It’s a marching band. So I’m practicing marching.”
“They won’t play songs like Uptown Funk or something?” Michael asked.
Ned surprised Michael by perfectly playing the chorus to Uptown Funk on the trumpet. It sounded nothing like the dying seal.
“That was really good,” Michael said.
“Thanks, but this band doesn’t play songs like that.”
“Would this band involve a cat in a baseball cap?” Michael asked.
“Yes, and a Border Collie named Sarah, Mike the monkey, and a bird named Gustav?” Ned asked. “No, that’s all hypothetical.”
“Well, what kind of songs does this band play?”
“They call it squawk rock,” Ned said.
“They all call it that. Not just Gustav the bird?” Michael asked.
“Hypothetically, they all call it that.”